Merry, Merry Christmas

Ahhh... Frank Sinatra and Bing Crosby are singing my favorite Christmas carols, the tree is glowing, and there is snow on the ground... (ahem, not here... but up north). It's Christmas! I love Christmas. Everything about it just puts you in a good mood. Christmas has been different for me this year. Good different.

I want to preface this post a little... I debated on writing my thoughts and feelings down because it might seem like I'm "trying" to be a good Christian by saying some of these things. I know a lot of this stuff is said all the time with no real conviction behind it but I started this blog to be honest with myself and transparent to my friends so with that said... I'll continue.

For the past month Chad has been asking about my Christmas list. What do I want for Christmas? It has to be something fun and not a practical thing. Okay... I can do this. So I tried to come up with something. I kept trying and kept trying. Maybe I haven't been window shopping enough lately?? I didn't have the slightest clue as to what I wanted for Christmas. I kept racking my brain for weeks. I came up with a pathetic little list. Nothing special... just stuff. I found myself thinking about it again this past Thursday. What do I want? What do I want? I was listening to a local Christian radio while running some errands and they started talking about a baby in the hospital that needs a heart.

As they talked about needing a miracle, I started to think about my boys. Both beautiful, healthy, happy kids. Uneventful pregnancies, wonderful births, and no issues. These overwhelming feelings of thankfulness came over me. My mind ran through all of the memories in the past few years and how lucky we are to have the things that we have. God gave me a present that day. My heart and head wrapped around the fact that we are so blessed.

I realized that I was content and I was treating that as a bad thing. I was trying to force myself to want something. I really didn't want anything. I was content. I think in today's society, that is a miracle in itself!!!!

So this Christmas I want to give. That's what I want.

Finding another pediatrician

I was dreading this part of moving. We had finally found a pediatrician we absolutely loved in North Augusta and then I was going to have to start all over again. I had a lot of thought and prayer behind my first interview with a doctor here.

I asked some of the ladies at MOPS (Moms of Preschoolers) for some suggestions and the one with the most recommendations was Dr. Slade. So I did some research and read his bio on the practice's website. He's a christian and actually went to MCG. Okay, I'm interested. The practice even has after hours care where the doctor's rotate during the evenings. How nice. Because your kid never gets sick when it's convenient - hence Thanksgiving this year. Corben got sick a few days before Thanksgiving and then by Thanksgiving day - I had a sore throat, Chad had flu symptoms and the baby had a cough. LOVELY! Luckily my stuff was just minor so I could take care of everybody else. It wasn't exactly the Thanksgiving we imagined but we still had a lot to be thankful for.

Back to the pediatrician - I set up an interview with him this past Thursday. I was nervous. I consider myself a pretty weird mom. Back home I didn't feel so weird because I had other mom friends that had similar philosophies. But I know we aren't the norm so it makes me feel like a little bit of a freak but oh well. If being a vaccine skeptic, natural remedy peddler, breastfeeding, baby-wearing, cloth diapering, anal about how much processed food my kid has, pro-organic, anti-daycare, mom makes me a freak... I think I'm okay with that. I think. A lot of it has to do with loving my kids and then the other half is my need to be an over-achiever. If I'm going to do something I'm not going to do it half way - especially if it comes to my kids. I do give myself a break though... I don't start twitching when thinking about giving Corben Chicken nuggets from a fast food place. LOL! I've toned down a lot, I promise!

Anyway back to the pediatrician... again! I mainly just wanted to get a feel for him as a person and his medical philosophy. I want someone that is practical, laid back, respects my role as the parent, is an educator as well as a doctor, doesn't over-medicate or "medicate the parents," and won't treat me like I have three heads if I want to go about things in a different way. I want an environment that encourages open conversation. We started off with the general conversation about moving to Macon and then he asked if I had any questions. I shared with him about our previous doctor and the not-so-great experience we had with our first. And basically wanted to know his experience and medical philosophy on alternate vaccine schedules, breastfed babies, natural remedies etc etc. His responses were very positive. Of course he is totally behind vaccines but wasn't condescending about it at all. He gave his son all the vaccines on the normal schedule, etc. But he followed that with, in the end the parent has to be comfortable with the decisions. Bingo! That's where I am right now in my decision about vaccinating. I don't feel comfortable doing the normal schedule. Something deep down just doesn't feel right, so I can't do it. If something happened and I went against my gut instinct I could never forgive myself. He was very nice and laid back and even cracked a few jokes. And he kept talking about how cute Devlin was. It's always a plus when a pediatrician loves kids :). He said that this was not a practice that medicated the parent and that there are a lot of things that will go away on their own without antibiotics etc. He talked a lot about working as a team and that in the end the parents are with the kids all the time so they will have to make the final decision on what is best.

So my conclusion... I like him. That's exactly what I want in a pediatrician. Someone working along side of me to make sure my kid is as healthy as possible. I'm so glad I didn't have to do multiple interviews. God's looking out for me, once again!

aahh Baby it's cold outside!

I love Christmas and all the cold weather that comes with it. Some snow would be nice too but living in the south, you never know if you'll see it. I remember when we lived up in PA. My brother and I went nuts when there was only two inches of snow on the ground. We were making snowmen and having snowball fights. Everybody thought we were crazy but two inches was a lot to us!

I can't believe it's December already! I feel like I have accomplished a lot lately. I've been working a good bit, which is nice to make some extra money for Christmas and all the birthdays we have in December. It's Chad's birthday, then Corben's, and then Chad's mom's is Christmas Day. Could December get any busier?

I have to admit there are still boxes lurking around. With the holiday's coming up and all the family that is planning to come and visit, I have a renewed drive to get the house looking nice. It's just hard to get motivated when you are in an apartment. I keep telling myself it will only be for a little while longer. We have started to look at houses in the area. Just leisurely. We probably won't do anything until close to our lease being up but it's good to go ahead and start looking. I can't wait to know I'm going to be in one spot for a while!

I miss everybody in Augusta very much and am hoping that maybe we could come for a few days around Christmas. I'd love to be able to catch up with people if I can!

I'm in love!

I talked Chad into letting me order a Milkies Milk Saver! It came in the mail yesterday and I could not wait to use it. My friend Sara sent me the link to their site months ago and I could not get over how ingenious it is.

It collects your milk while you nurse on the other side. So no more wasted milk! It so disappointing to fill up disposable nursing pads when you could be storing that precious liquid!!

I am just so impressed with how easy it is. Who has time to plug yourself up to a pump? I've gotten about an ounce to 2 ounces when I use it. So I could get about a bottle a day potentially. And it's virtually no effort! If you want to know more about it, check out their site - www.mymilkies.com.

Had to share! When I have more time (haha!) I'll get my birth story up. But until then, it will probably just be short random thoughts and rants from all the craziness of moving etc.

HELLO BABY

It's been a while since I've posted. Most of you know that baby Devlin arrived the afternoon after my last post. Woo hoo! I was so excited to be going into labor! Labor was about 4 hours and I was very happy with my experience with the midwife. I was up laughing and talking not long after labor. The combination of hormones and all that weight gone probably had me doing more before my body was really ready.

The transition has been very smooth. It's like he came out a 2 month old! He latched on perfectly from the start and he has good head control to somewhat be able to do it himself. He is eating like a champ and we don't have any issues with jaundice. He's been such a great baby so far. He loves to sleep and eat and that's about it! God has really answered my prayers. I was concerned about how I could handle the transition with the impending move in a few weeks. Corben loves him already and wants to see everything I'm doing that involves the baby. I didn't sleep for the first few days but I think I've given up on that from now on-- if we have more kids. The adrenaline from natural birth is so strong, I can't sleep the first night.

He's still a little off on his days/nights but it's starting to work itself out and I'm getting 2 to 3 hours stints of sleep at a time. Well I'm going to take advantage of nap time and rest a little before it's time to feed baby again. I'm sure I'll post the official "birth story" soon.

Where are you baby?

So I am one day past my estimated due date. This baby feels sooo heavy. I feel like I'm rolling over with a watermelon on my stomach at night.

I have had a lot more pain, so much so that I find it hard to walk if the baby is in a certain position. It's like someone stabbing me with a knife and twisting it at random times. Sounds lovely huh?

I have another appt tomorrow. I was really hoping I wouldn't be going. We've done everything except caster oil and cohosh to induce labor.

I'm munching on fresh pineapple as I type. Yum. I bought some primrose oil caplets. Chad's rubbed the pressure points to induce labor. Sex, even though it is not real appealing at this point in pregnancy. I've taken a relaxing bath. Walked, walked and walked!!!

Maybe if I jump backwards under a full moon? Any suggestions?

If I don't go into labor tonight. I'm having her strip my membranes tomorrow. Let's get this show on the road!

Preggo update 3,452... just kidding.

Another appt. today. At this rate I'll be going everyday soon, at least it seems like.

I finally have some hard data, more for Chad's sake than anything else. He freaked out when he found out that the midwife doesn't really check me until closer to the birth. He needs numbers, hard evidence. Which most of us that have had children know that dilation doesn't really mean a thing. But I guess it's nice to know my body is somewhat preparing.

So I'm 2-3 cm dilated and she wants to see me again on Monday. So I don't know if she has a hunch that I'm going to go soon or what. Today would be awesome. Chad is off today and tomorrow morning. That would be soo convenient but who knows. Baby will come when he's ready.

That's all I have for you for now! Keep us in your prayers!

Preggo update week 38

I ended up having my drs appt today rather than Monday which has totally thrown me off. My midwife actually wasn't able to be there this morning but they were still able to do my ultrasound.

The tech checked everything and was super nice she even printed out some 3D pics for me and just told me not to show anyone. She was so excited to try and catch his little face and I wasn't opposed to it :) We actually got to see him open and close his little mouth it was so great. I think the ultrasound tech was just as excited as we were! It's so nice to find people that are passionate about what they do. I just love that. Everyone should love their job that much. She said she has been doing this for thirty years now and she still gets excited when she gets to see things like that. How cool is that?

Anyway - back to the info I was waiting for. The baby is weighing in at about 7lbs 9 oz which is what Corben weighed when he was born and we are pretty close to about the same time that Corben was born. So the weight is definitely in the normal range. She said I had upper average fluid (about 18.5). The average is between 5 - 20. So I'm still average and she said it's much better to have more than little. So that could be one of the reasons I was measuring big and she also said that the other tech tends to measure large sometimes. I didn't think about differences from one tech to another. So my mind is at ease. I don't think I'll be birthing a 12 pound baby :) YAY!

Everything is looking great and I went ahead and scheduled my next appt to see Amanda for Friday because Chad is off that day for sure and it's close enough to my usual Monday appts. So I have no info to give on dilation but it not going to tell me anything magical anyway!

My energy levels have been really crazy lately. They go between the two extremes of exhaustion and lots of energy. The other night I couldn't even sleep because I wanted to get up and clean the house! I ended up getting back up and doing little things around the house until 2 in the morning. Even after that I couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep well.

I'm looking forward to labor that is for sure! That's all for now! Maybe the next post will be "Hey we're in labor!" ::crossing fingers:: :)

Oh yeah. Makin a baby is hard work.

I can't help but share this.

I'm so getting this. I've always loved these vintage woman posters but have never seen one like this! I don't really want to pay 35 bucks for the shirt so I may just get the pin. But it's so me... I love it!

This is from Muthacrafter (a seller on etsy). Brilliant.. just brilliant.

Preggo update week 37

I just got back from my midwife appointment.

Everything looks great. Blood pressure, weight etc.
I am measuring 40 cm at 37 weeks though! I'm just hoping that the baby was in a weird position or something instead of being really big or having a complication. She scheduled another ultrasound for next week to make sure everything was still okay. I'm trying not to worry about it. Maybe it just means that the due date is off and I should be having the baby soon (crossing my fingers).

She didn't check me. She said that she usually doesn't until 38 - 39 weeks unless I just want her too. So I decided to just wait. It doesn't really mean anything anyway. I could be dilated the same for 3 weeks before I go into labor. So we'll just wait and see.

I've had about 3 or 4 contractions today. So my body is getting ready.

I'm doing my 2 cups of raspberry tea a day and trying to make sure I keep walking (even though I feel huge) to keep my stamina up and to help the baby get into position.

I just finished my new nursing cover and I love it. I tried a different pattern this time and added a little terry cloth pocket to the underside. I think I'm going to make some cloth teething rings now. It looks so easy I just have to try it. Here's the tutorial if you want to take a look.

Keep us in your prayers as we await the delivery of a healthy baby boy!

Are we there yet?

Ok. I feel gigantic! I know I've got to be bigger than I was with Corben at week 37. The baby is definitely dropped and I've been having braxton hicks now and then. I have lots of pressure and it seems like the baby is pushing against my cervix.

I'm so ready to have this baby! I really don't want to go much longer. I can't imagine how big I am going to be if I do! Ahhh!

I have my next appt. Monday and I am anxious to see if I am dilated any. I feel like my body is getting ready but you can never know for sure.

It's so frustrating. Especially because I really didn't have much happen before my water broke with Corben. And now I'm actually experiencing braxton hicks for the first time this time. Sometimes they are somewhat painful too. It's getting me even more anxious. I think I would just rather have my water break and everything just happen all of a sudden. Than have all these little warning signs. Just come already! My midwife is back in town. Chad is a few weeks from starting a new job. This week or next would be perfect! Please? Can you hear me in there?

Celebrating Devlin

I just got back from my baby shower and I can't say enough. It was just perfect! Down to every little detail. I felt like all my favorite things and favorite people were all put together in one place.

The theme was a combination of things - Quotes, chocolate, and coffee with blue and brown as the colors. All some of my most favorite things!

They had beautiful quotes about babies placed around for decorations, a chocolate fountain, cheerwine, and coffee among other delicious treats of fruit, chocolate covered pretzels, cookies, brownies etc.

I think I'm going to have to lay off the sugar and caffeine for the rest of the day because baby had plenty of that today already!

Sometimes I feel like people don't really know me... like really, really. You know what I mean? It's partly my fault because it takes me a while to open up to people. But today I felt fully known and fully loved. For someone to take that much care and time to throw a party for me, just means the world to me.

And to have so many people come to celebrate our new little one and just spend time enjoying each others company. Was so so nice. I can't say much more about it than it was perfect. Just perfect.

Dr. Appt update

It's been so crazy around here. I have at least 5 posts I need to do!

Had another Dr. appointment Monday. Everything is going well. They did another ultrasound and he's supposedly already 6 lbs 14 oz! He doesn't need to get much bigger! The Tech even switched over to the 4-D to try to get a look at the face. I was so excited! But of course my little stinker didn't want to move his hand! So all I got to see was the eyes and nose. But it was beautiful!

I'm really excited to see him soon. My baby shower is this weekend and I am so excited to have some time to relax and enjoy my friend's company!

It seems like all my days are running together already! More Dr.'s appointments, trying to make playdates before the baby comes, organizing everything Corben and I will need once I go in the hospital, and getting the house in order. The list just keeps going! I feel like it's taking forever to get here but yet coming so fast at the same time!

Who said weddings have to be boring?

Okay if we ever renew our vows this has given me a great idea for how we should do it. This is hilarious!



I think we should do this to "Now that we've found love" by Heavy D & the Boyz. If you've ever watched the movie "HITCH" (which you should - Will Smith's superior acting, a love story, and plenty of funny moments, what's not to love?) They dance to this song at the end and it's hilarious. LOL I'm excited already.

Hey Sara want to do some choreography?

Preggo update week 35

Back by popular demand. My preggo update...

I'm 34 weeks and am into my 35th week. I'm SOOOO uncomfortable!!!!! Okay now that I got that out.

I'm having lots of pelvic and back pain, some acid reflux, and some trouble sleeping well. But no swelling this pregnancy! I do have that to be thankful for. I guess it makes a difference when you aren't spending 8 hours a day in an office chair.

Some days are better than others, especially in regards to energy. We are definitely gearing up for the baby to come. We had a refresher childbirth class. Even though we gave birth only 19 months ago it was still a good thing. I was so excited when I found out that the teacher was actually my lactation consultant from when Corben was born. I loved her! She even answered some of my breastfeeding questions months later and was such a great help. I would love it if she happened to be my labor and deliver nurse! She does a lot now that I think about it. She's a nurse, lactation consultant, and she teaches classes. Her card has so many initials behind it that it goes to the next line. I have no idea what most of them are but it makes me feel like she must be a very capable nurse! She was very encouraging and told me that most moms find it to be much easier to breastfeed the second time because they are not so stressed and tense about it. That made me feel good. When I told her who my Dr. was she also seemed excited about that and told me that I'm in good hands. That made me feel good too since I am using a midwife for the first time.

We really enjoyed the class and I think it helped Chad wrap his brain around the idea that the baby is going to be here soon. We have been dealing with so much lately I think it's sneaking up on both of us. However, those round ligament pains do remind me all too often now! I can definitely feel the baby lower in my pelvis and sitting on anything other than my exercise ball is pretty uncomfortable at times.

I have another Dr. appointment and ultrasound on this coming Monday to make sure everything is going well. I think I go every week after that.

Now we just have to get the house ready and I think we are going to try to make a day trip to the beach before it gets too close. There just aren't enough days in the week to get everything done!

A Day Sent From Up Above

Wow, I didn't know I had that cheesy title in me.

It's what this day has done to me. I think I have a new best friend. I happened to come in contact with the coordinator of the Tuscany spa school of message about six months ago. She's such a fun, sweet person. We haven't gotten to really hang out much because we are both so busy. But the few interactions I've had with her have really made a mark. Anyway. She coordinates the school stuff and it just so happens that they are doing their prenatal message section and they needed some pregnant bodies to facilitate some practice.

Well, you know I am all about furthering someone's education and was happy to donate my body to science and lots of rubbing. Nicole you are awesome!

It was sooo nice! It was free, 90 minutes long (90 minutes!), and ssssssssssoooooo wonderful for a pregnant body. The girls were really sweet and made sure I was comfortable the whole time and made sure I was okay with every part of the message.

Then to top it all off. I came home to relieve my parents from looking after Corben for me and they had cleaned the house. Wow... I was totally pampered today. God you are looking out for me. I am sooo blessed.

Especially after dealing with all the car switching drama the past week. This was a much needed mental and physical break.

Sigh...........

Minivan MOM

Yes, that's right. I'm officially a minivan mom. We sold our car and bought a minivan today. I think I'm actually the first in my family to give in, besides my parents. My oldest brother has three kids all in car seats and they still bought a Yukon because he couldn't bear the thought of owning a minivan. The Morlan pride runs deep my friends. I fought it as long as I could but I couldn't negate the logic and practicality of it any longer.

It's definitely comfortable and roomy. And not nearly as hot as the black car we had (uggh, it took forever to cool down that car). The previous owners liked to name their cars, so it is "Dan the Van." I think we should get some spinner hubcaps and some racing stripes for it. Hey, it is the sports model :)

It took me a little while to get used to the idea and surprisingly Chad didn't care in the slightest. He was happy to get a van. Go figure... like I said, the Morlan pride runs deep.

So I'm embracing the Minivan Mom idea :) It's only for a time. I'll have my little sports mini cooper one day, but for now... I'll be driving my van and paddle-shifting my little sports car in my head.

Preggo update week 32

It's probably about time for another preggo update!
I have my next appointment tomorrow morning and am already in my 32nd week! Can you believe it? I think I start going every two weeks now.

I'm getting pretty big and baby Devlend loves to move around. He's going to be a feisty one or maybe just a kick-boxer. He'll move my whole body sometimes.. it's crazy. Corben was a little more subtle in his movements and stretches. Everything is going well, I'm just ready for this summer heat to pass! At least I'm not swelling yet. Thank God for that!

We're starting to think seriously about the birth, who's going to watch Corben, and the fact that we probably need to be prepared for a fast delivery. Baby will be here before we know it!

Finally a Belly Shot!

I finally remembered~!

FREE CHOCOLATE

Ah free chocolate...

I had to share this great find. Every Friday thru September... THRU SEPTEMBER! You can go to this site and get a coupon for free chocolate from Mars company.

There is a limit of 250,000 coupons per Friday so go right at 9 am.

I know all you pregnant ladies out there are drooling already. Get your chocolate on... for free!

Real Chocolate Relief Act

A little bit of nostalgia makes everything better

We went to see Chad's parents again this past week and will probably be the last time before the new baby comes. We are happy that they now live closer and we are able to see them more and Corben is getting to know his other set of grandparents.

However it is always a very hard trip for me. Chad's parents are much older and have had a lot of health problems, so they aren't really able to help much with Corben. I freak out a little inside when his mom picks him up. She's really not supposed to lift that much weight. So because of this usually Chad ends up trying to help his mom & dad with projects that they are not able to do. Then Corben is in a new place with lots of new stuff to teach him not to touch etc. Then add on the fact that I am pregnant and already tired :). I'm sure you get the idea...

This trip was actually better than past ones. I tried to take Corben outside to run around any time he seemed to get restless. I think the change of scenery on a constant basis helped a lot. And for some reason... my third trimester feels like it should be my second. I've gotten my energy back. I've been exhausted throughout the first and second trimester. The second was slightly better than the first but once I hit the third ... I was back again!

I just thought I didn't get my energy back during the second trimester because I had a toddler but I think this pregnancy is just different. I can't wait to see what kind of individual Devlend is going to be... because he sure has been very different from Corben so far :)

So on the way home we stopped for some gas at the only gas station for a good long time outside of Anderson, SC. And of course it is also a bait/tackle/hunting shop also :) The bathrooms were even marked "Doe's" and "Buck's". Yeah not kidding. Anyway, I walked by the coolers and I noticed that they had glass bottle sodas!

You hardly ever see those anymore and they had Cheerwine in a glass bottle. If you've grown up in this area you probably know what Cheerwine is but if not... It's not wine... it's a soda that is cherry flavored. It's soo good. And to top it off, it's made with real cane sugar, no high fructose corn syrup. What's not to love? Every time we would stop at a gas station growing up, my dad would get me a 33 cent Cheerwine. Maybe it tastes so good to me because it reminds me of my childhood.

So of course I couldn't pass it up. It was a little bit of heaven. That was my Job 8:21 for the day... a cool crisp bottle of cheer :) A little bit of nostalgia makes everything better.

Spilling the beans. Are you ready?

All right, I'm going to share our name pick...

I've had plenty of time since all the baby naming drama, so I'm ready to spill the beans.

Here it is ... drum roll please...

Devland (or Devlend) Cruz Gammon

I like Devlen better but Chad is insisting on having the "d" on the end. So I'm warming to it. It means "fierce courage" and is very Irish, which is one of the reasons why I love it. We really like it and feel like it is sophisticated and different but not crazy different.

It fits us :)

Dirty Hippie Is BACK!

I hung out with a long time friend today and it got my wheels turning about a lot of different subjects. I've been having some writer's block lately but I got some fuel to my fire today and am going to jump into some really interesting conversations.

The first one I love, because it validates my skepticism and who doesn't like to be validated? :) As I've talked about many times before... the more I learn, the more skeptical I am about my food, what I put in and on my body etc.

Which brings me to my next point... Jet fuel in my baby's formula. Don't know if any of you have heard about this but, to be honest, it didn't surprise me a ton. Here is the link to an article about it http://www.yourlawyer.com/articles/read/16363 and you might have seen it on the news etc.

The rocket fuel component, perchlorate, has been found in baby formulas. The EPA knew it was there but didn't think it was at a level high enough that would harm infants. Well guess what? They forgot to think about the fact that formula... gets mixed with water which has also been found to have percholorate in it. So the combination can make it to toxic levels. OOPS! Oops and my infant aren't two words I want in the same sentence.

I have been repeatedly shown that natural, in most every area of life, is the way to go... You can't rely on other people to make sure that what you eat and use is of good quality and safe. It's been proven time and time again that the FDA isn't really doing much for us. It's time for society to be more RESPONSIBLE. I know that is a dirty word and most everyone just wants to do what's easy and convenient for them so that they don't have to use their brains. But we are reaping the consequences because of that line of thinking ... or not thinking :).

So call me a dirty hippie if you want... but it's not looking quite so dirty anymore.

Have you made someone's day lately?

It's amazing how someone can bless you so much within just a few short minutes of knowing them. Corben and I stopped by a yard sale on our way home this morning and while I was sorting through clothes Corben made friends with the woman having the yard sale's little boy. He was a little older than Corben but so sweet and couldn't wait to show Corben how things worked and what to play with next. I talked with the mom while sorting through clothes and she commented on how beautiful Corben is. What mom doesn't love that? Her daughter even held him in her lap and played with him a few minutes. He was having so much fun. I hated to have to leave.

I noticed on the way in that there was a box of A Beka curriculum for kindergarten that didn't have a price on it. So I asked her about it and she took me over and told me about it and asked if I wanted to homeschool and my response is that I want too :). Same response I gave to breastfeeding and having natural childbirth... I want to. I've never experienced it or tried it... but I want to. She told me I could have it! Really? I thanked her many times over and payed her for the baby clothes I picked up. Then I had to sadly pick Corben up and take him to the car. He was so heartbroken and cried the whole way to the car. He was enjoying himself so much and they were such a sweet family. It was only a few minutes of interaction but it made my day. I was blessed.

I did feel bad for Corben though. It just reiterates the fact that Corben does not get enough socialization. He loves being around other kids. He'll mostly just watch them, but he loves it. I feel so awful every time I think about it. It's hard for me to really play with him these days, now that I am getting bigger. Keeping a boy occupied requires a lot of roughhousing, flips and chasing :). And I just don't have it in me much. Poor guy. So later today I took him to a park with a special toddler playground to make it up to him. And of course I over did it. My back hurts from putting Corben on top of the slide over and over and I am exhausted... but Corben had a good time and got to watch other kids run and play and even go up and stare at a few toddler aged friends :). And I got to see some other moms too.


It was a good day... I'm going to go lie down now! :)

I may be messy but I'm not lazy

I love this mug over at perpetualkid.com

And my husband can vouch for all the type A people - what is says is totally true.

Drama & Smiles

Just when I think things are going smoothly somebody goes and acts like an idiot. Why? Why can't things just flow smoothly? Wouldn't that be interesting if God gave us some "no idiot" dust that we could sprinkle on people when they need a good turn around? Okay I know we couldn't do that all the time... but maybe just a few sprinkles that we could use at strategic times in our lifetime. Unfortunately we can't live peoples lives for them... even when we really, really, really want too.

One can dream I guess...

Life will never be perfect or stress free so we just have to focus on those little things that make us smile. That's why I love the verse Job 8:21 - God promises that he will give us something to smile about everyday. What an awesome promise. Some days I see those loud and clear and some days I feel like I need to remind God "Okay God you said you will give me something to smile about, I really need that right now." It never fails...

My something to smile about today was playing on the floor with Corben and he decided he wanted to lay beside mommy and rest too. He kicked his little feet in front of me and looked up at the TV. I couldn't help but smile at those little toes and feet... that used to be so tiny and now are growing strong and keeping mommy chasing after them everyday. I'm so blessed to be a mom... who couldn't smile at that?

Okay now I'm ready to have this baby!

Woohoo!

We have a name! It's a miracle!

I think we have finally figured out our process. So if we decide to have more kids we'll know what to do. Chad ended up sitting down with the baby name book for hours, yes hours, pouring over every name and making a list that he was comfortable with. It was nice to see him put so much effort into it. Since it's mostly been me pouring over websites and books every free second I get for months now. I think just spouting out names doesn't really let him get a real sense of the name so he just tends to say no to most of them.

Which of course makes me feel like he just shoots down everything I like. The funny thing is, some of the ones he chose were ones I had mentioned before. He just needed his own time to sit down and process them.

Men are so odd and I'm sure I'll spend the rest of my life trying to figure them out. But that's okay, I think we get each other once we really take the time to understand how the other person works.

I'm so glad this is over. It was really affecting how I felt about the new baby. All I was getting was negative responses from everyone - at least it felt that way. So it doesn't make you too happy especially when you are hormonal anyway.

So with that said, I am going to pray about whether or not I want to share the name we picked out. I'm really excited to share, but more than anything I want to be excited about my baby and not let anything get in the way of that.

I don't think most people quite understand how much naming means to me. I have loved names all of my life. Even when I was younger I had a baby name book (which freaked my parents out a little bit) but I was always fascinated by name meanings and origins. It was just fun. Names are so important, its one of the first gifts you will give your child and you want it to be perfect, from your heart and a reflection of both parents.

So for right now we are still telling people we are naming him Beauregard (ha ha).

Pregnancy, work, and letting go

Well the warm weather seems like it is finally here to stay and summer is right around the bend. The pool in our community just opened up and I can't wait for the whole fam to go and enjoy the water. I found a really cute maternity swimsuit. It's strange that I am more comfortable in my pregnant body than I am in my "regular" body. I feel pretty and that's a nice feeling. Even though some days I'm sure I'm not (you know those - I don't have time to shower, baby woke up way earlier than usual, I didn't get a nap, and baby is cranky - kind of exhausting days) but there's just something beautiful about being pregnant that tends to overflow to the outside. Not to mention that God helps us out by making our hair fuller and shinier and our skin glow.

I'm still transitioning out of my "regular" job and God is providing lots of freelance opportunities, which is what I want to focus on from now on. I'm excited to not feel as stressed and to take more time for my son and my pregnant body. I can tell a difference already in Corben's behavior and I'm sure it has a lot to do with me having more patience with him. I want to give Corben more opportunities to socialize and for me to socialize too! It's not only great for him but a life saver for me, it's not just a "want" anymore, it's a necessity. Remember a few posts back I talked about slowing down and focusing on my family etc. Well this is the start. I didn't know if it would feel right not having a "regular" job and wondered if I could let that go. But it does and I'm still going to get to do some design stuff as I designate that I have time for it. That's what I need right now and that's what my family needs right now.

I keep promising that I will post a photo and I keep forgetting! I'll try to do that asap!

Have a great day!

I'm back! A quick synopsis.

I know I've been a little slack lately about posting... so here I am trying to get back on track.

I feel like I've been pulled in all directions lately but am hoping it will slow down soon. It should since I decided to finally let go of my usual gig at the Vineyard. I will still be taking on projects, just totally on my schedule which is what I need right now. My time is not my own with chasing Corben around and trying to take care of the baby in my tummy too.

God finally got me to a place where I was ready to go. It would have been even harder for me otherwise. But I'm ready. It is time.

So much has happened lately...
Corben is now settled into a big boy bunk bed which he transitioned to with such ease at 15 months! I was so surprised at how well he did. He's such a big boy now (insert sniffle here). When we transitioned Corben, we totally redid his room with IKEA kids stuff, I'll have to post some pics soon. It's so cute and so functional. We will be able to fit both boys in one room with no problem.

Pregnancy is going wonderful. I am just so tired all the time and with all the stress I have been under trying to tie up some projects and tell my boss that I'm leaving... I've felt it even more lately.

We still have yet to decide on a baby name... so if anyone has any suggestions, please throw them our way. Or I think we will just name him Bob or something. For those of you grueling over baby names like I am, I found this awesome website that really helps you narrow it down. It looks up names based on names that you input that you like. I don't know how many times I come up with a few names that are along the lines of what I want but not quite. So instead going through lists and lists of names, it narrows down the choices based on the types of names you already like. Check it out... I can't get enough of it www.nymbler.com.

That's all for now. I promise I'll be back soon.

The Cadillac of Strollers

I have had so many posts rolling around in my brain lately. I finally have a chance to sit down and write one! My parents went up to the IKEA Charlotte with us yesterday to pick up a bunk bed for Corben. We had a lot of fun and my mom was in heaven. She loves decorating/interior design.

We were all in the cafe, eating some scrumptious IKEA food when I saw a women put her small newborn in the lower portion of a jogging stroller. I was looking from the front so I couldn't see everything but my first instinct was alarm. You aren't supposed to put little babies in the bottom of that! When she wheeled by I couldn't help but inspect more.

There was a little napper area in the back of the stroller. Her 2 year old was strapped in front and her newborn was cozily snuggled in the napper in the back/bottom. I was immediately in awe of this stroller.

Later we passed by her and I asked her about the stroller. She said it was wonderful, especially if you have your kids close together (her two were 20 months apart). Corben will be about 21 months when our new little one is born. She said it was pretty expensive but her mother-in-law bought it for them and she couldn't be more grateful.

I knew as soon as I got home I would be looking up the specs on a Phil & Ted's stroller. I have been checking out lots of double strollers lately, especially ones that accommodate an infant and a toddler. Most of these stroller weigh anywhere from 35 to 50 pounds. Can you imagine lugging that thing in and out of your car! 50 pounds!!

This stroller is only 24 pounds and is about the footprint of a regular full size single stroller. I'm in love. I don't know if I could see myself spending between $500 and $700 dollars on a stroller. OUCH!

But with as much as I take Corben for walks and like to get out of the house. It may be worth it. I'll be daydreaming about this one for a while...

Drum Roll Please......

Alright everybody! I know you are dying to know the news...

Surprise! It's a B-O-Y!

I think he fooled almost everybody! Chad was a little disappointed we weren't having a girl, especially since he "knew" we were having a girl. Now we just have to figure out a name!

So the one person who voted that it would be a boy... you were so right!

I'll post some sonogram pics as soon as I can. Two boys, wow.

Come on out and vote!

Only a few hours left! Make sure you get out and vote... for my baby that is :) Don't forget to take the poll on the right to predict what we are having!

I'm really nervous actually.

We really don't know how many children we plan to have and are just kind of seeing when our family feels "complete." But who knows... this could be it. We may feel complete after two. What if this is the last time we find out what we are having? Just kind of crazy to think about!

Preggo update week 19

Hello Everybody!
I'm almost half way there. Can you believe it? I'm feeling lots of stretching lately so I'm assuming that's the baby making some room in there. I have my ultrasound next Tuesday. So when we find out I'm sure I'll post here ASAP.

We tried to call everybody the first pregnancy and we were on the phone all day! So we're going to try to be a little more efficient this time.

I'm feeling pretty good overall. My nausea came back for a few days during my second trimester which was really strange but I haven't seen any signs of it lately. I'm starting to want healthier food again. I would have to make myself eat a banana or a veggie. I just wanted bread or chocolate milk etc. Not really healthy stuff. Which is a big difference from Corben. I wanted fruit and milk... I would eat a whole quarter watermelon in one sitting. Yum... that does actually sound pretty good right now :) Publix here I come. So I'm happy I'm getting some healthy cravings. I always feel so guilty if I don't eat well.

I do still have that deep craving for McDonald's sweet tea. This was a tradition when Sara and I were pregnant last time. I can't be out and about without getting one. And for a buck who can resist?

I think it would be fun to do a poll on who thinks it is a boy or a girl. So following in Micah and Melissa blog's footsteps I'm going to do my first poll. Who, by-the-way just had a beautiful little boy a few weeks ago. Little Paul is adorable! Anyway, come on and take the poll! I want to see what you guys think. I'm biting my nails in anticipation.

NOte to self: Kicking the habit of biting my nails needs to go on my 101 list!

Awesome Video

I found this on another blog and couldn't stop watching it. Very creative and unique concept. I had to share...

We'll water down your juice and sell it to you at double the price!

Yes people. It's watered down juice. Welch's - being the brilliant company that they are - are selling this to you at the same price as the 100% juice and touting it as "a lower calorie alternative" Are you kidding me? Buy the 100% juice and dilute it in half with filtered water. Bam..."Aquajuice" at half the price.

Do people really fall for this? Makes me sad. Are we really this dumb?

I noticed this today as I was walking down the juice aisle and could not believe it. Welch's I need to come work for you. If you can actually make money off this... wow... you guys are doing something right.

Got an old button up shirt?

I came across this adorable little girls dress idea over at crafster.com. You can find the tutorial here. I can't wait to do this with one of Chad's old shirts... too bad we've gotten rid of a lot of his "surfer dude" wear... Too bad... I mean thank God! :)

You can take the boy out of Florida but you can't take the Florida out of the boy.

Dirty Hippie in the garden

Well I guess it's time for another episode of the "dirty hippie." It's spring and it seems that the whole family is really into working out-of-doors right now. Chad is working the backyard and planting seed to grow better grass, and I've decided to try to start small with an herb garden.

I'm just doing potted plants for now. It's a long way down to our backyard from the deck and I don't think my pregnant behind is going to go up and down to water a garden for the next few months. Not happening. I didn't want to take on anything that big anyway. It seems that every time I try to grow something it dies. So we'll see...

What I've got so far are Basil, Oregano, Peppermint, Rosemary, Parsley and I tried one veggie - zucchini. My first trip to Lowe's (Before doing any research, this was all a little on a whim), I picked up the zucchini, peppermint, basil, and rosemary. All of it to go in a nice rectangular planter I bought (except for the zucchini of course). I brought it all home only to find out that the rosemary grows so big that it will need it's own pot and the peppermint is so aggressive it will take over whatever it is planted with. Ugh! So another trip to Lowe's and now I have a much bigger "little" garden than I bargained for. But I'm happy with it. It looks cute... now lets just see if I can keep it alive and cook with it. I'm so excited about that! Last year I would visit the local farm just to get a little bag of fresh basil... yum. Basil is probably my favorite herb and I only discovered it a few years ago.

Corben also enjoyed the whole experience. I gave him a pot and some rocks and his "choo choo" to play with and he went to town putting everything in and out of it and then running around yelling GROW! As I'm mixing potting soil. It was pretty hilarious. I don't think he connected the plants with growing. I think it was the fact that I kept bending over and then standing back up as I'm putting soil into pots. I sing this song to him that my mom used to sing to me when I was little and it goes a little like this... "Read your Bible, Pray everyday, and you grow, grow, grow." And when you say the grow you go from a shrunken position to standing up. Corben thinks it is hilarious.

Or I could just think that my child is a genius and just figured out for himself what plants do... yep that's probably it :)

25 Things

Well, while you are waiting for my 101 list, here is the 25 things list that is floating around facebook. I finally gave in and did it. So I thought I'd share it here too...

Okay I finally give in! Here are my 25 Things!

Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you.


1. At some point in my life I want to be a graphic designer for the CIA.

2. I took stage combat in college. Most fun I ever had in college. What's better than pretending to beat people up and it looking real?

3. I consider myself a pretty carefree person. The small stuff usually doesn't hurt my feelings.. well unless I'm pregnant and hormonal. But I am also secretly type A. I am very particular about certain things in my life. Mostly about business and graphic design.

4. Clubs I was in throughout my entire school experience: Drama Club, DECA, National Honor Society, SAT team, Bible Club, Beta Club oh and we can't forget the best one BHFA (Brazen Hussies and Floozies Anonymous) You and me Ash!

5. Chad and I constantly battle over the car air conditioning. I like it either totally on cold or totally on heat and when it gets to a comfortable temp I turn it off. He likes airflow constantly. I don't think I've ever used the medium temperature setting in my life!

6. I want to be a good dancer. At least enough to feel like I know what I'm doing on the dance floor. Salsa baby!

7. I always feel the need to educate people on why my profession is important. I'm sure one day I'll just submit and buy the shirt from Veer that says "I draw pictures all day." Sigh.

8. I have several goals as far as traveling: Ireland, New York, Backpacking through Europe... and what the heck... Fiji... because who would ever say no to Fiji.

9. I'm a pretty shy person when I first meet people. And it usually takes me a while to really open up to people and be myself. Unless I am the host of the party or in a leadership role... then somehow I can turn on the "outgoingness."

10. I have been married for five years and have a wonderful 15 month old boy and baby 2.0 on the way.

11. I have a notebook fetish. If I come across a pretty blank notebook I just have to buy it. I'll usually fill up a 1/4 of it with to do lists/thoughts/grocery lists/meeting notes etc and then it gets lost in the shuffle somewhere until I find it months later.

12. I love making homemade gifts for people. I just think it is so much better than buying something. Not that I don't buy gifts... I'd just rather make them.

13. I wanted to be Shirley Temple when I was a little girl. I would tell my parents "I'm not Gifton, I'm Heidi."

14. I like to mix corn and mash potatoes. It just tastes so much better that way.

15. My son's laugh can totally change my day.

16. Being a mom is one of the most challenging and rewarding things I've ever done.

17. I love coffee. It's amazing how a drink can bring people together so easily. "Hey wanna grab some coffee?"

18. Going back to the split personality free spirit/anal person that I am. I am definitely that way as a mom. I don't mind if my kid gets messy. I think it's all part of the learning process. But when it comes to how he's taken care of I'm pretty anal. I like to use cloth diapers/wipes, make my own wipes solution, I made a good bit of his baby food, I read labels religiously to make sure he isn't getting too much processed sugar and high fructose corn syrup, and I keep his meals pretty simple, fruits, veggies, fish/chicken, yogurt and cheese. All natural baby soap, sunscreen... well you get the idea.

19. I really love snowboarding. Okay I hated it the first day... but the second day rocked!

20. I am learning to sew and can't wait to get really good at it.

21. I can no longer say I have a favorite color. I guess it the curse of the job. I gravitate towards a group of colors like: Green, Brown, Blue, Orange, Red.... okay wait... never mind.

22. I have to write everything down or I will forget. I usually email myself with to do notes so that I don't have to worry about a physical list. I have a digital copy I can find anytime. I know it's sad :)

23. I've realized as I've gotten older everyone has a different idea of what a "good" movie is. I can watch a movie and think it is good because it was extremely entertaining, action-packed or dramatic... but I can also think a movie is good because it tells an interesting story in a very artistic way. Even though the latter may be a little more subtle.. it's still good.

24. I am near-sighted, I should wear glasses or contacts but I usually don't.

25. I once dyed my hair red and accidentally put chunky highlights that were neon macaroni orange in them. Oops! Thank God for my awesome hair dresser Monica! Wine and girlfriends doing each others hair does not mix. Hey it would have been cool if I was a rock star right?

101 Things

I am officially starting a 101 in 1001 days list. You can find more info on this challenge at http://www.dayzeroproject.com/.

As you have seen I have many things that are on my "mental list" to do but I think taking it a step further - writing it down and putting a time table on it, will give me that extra push I need to do these things that I've always wanted to do. I'm still working on my complete list and will post it as soon as it's finished. It's hard to come up with 101 things! I want to give myself plenty of time because I know there will be those things that pop in my head that I only think about now and then like working for the CIA... you know... little stuff :)

One of the things on my list will be from my last post about making more handmade stuff. I have to share another blog that I just adore homemade by jill. She has her favorite projects listed on the side bar and they are so great! Perfect for baby shower gifts or things for your own little one. She always has such great and simple ideas and she's a new mom herself of a cute little boy.

On a side note. Please be praying for God's direction in our family this year. We have a lot to accomplish and some great opportunities that may be heading our way. But we need the wisdom and discernment that goes along with all that.

Love and Blessings!

Handmade Baby

photo provided by: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10872832

I've really been wanting to make some toys for the two little ones in my life. I think it's a great way to #1 know where the toys are coming from and what they are made of and #2 have a family heirloom that maybe they will save for their little ones someday.

I have all the tools and skills to do it. I just need to get on the ball! Here is a great website with tutorials and ideas that you can use to make your own toys/dolls. A lot of them are very simple and you don't have to be "super-crafty" to do it.

makebabystuff.com

If you look around you can find lots of cute things to make for baby like clothes and nursery decor.

I know not everyone feels this way but I think something handmade is a million times more special than getting something from a store. Especially in this day in age. Time is so finite and people are rushing about all the time. To know that someone stopped their busy schedule to make you something is just amazing! I love it!

Speaking of... go support handmade stuff! Find something cool on etsy.com for yourself or a friend.

New Hair woohoo!

Get ready for a new haircut! Okay I won't show you my belly yet but I'll show you my new haircut. I'm sad, I know.

I'm going first thing in the morning to see the fabulous Monica and finally get my hair cut off! I sadly haven't had a haircut in .... about 10 months probably. Wow. I didn't realize it had been that long! Time flies when you are chasing a baby around! I'm thinking of doing something based on one of Katie Holmes haircuts but I'm not sure. I'll see what Monica thinks.

I'm very excited! I always feel like a new person afterward.

So until tomorrow. I know all of you will be glued to the computer in anticipation. :)

Preggo update week 14

Hello All,
I just had my second appointment and the last of my first trimester. Everything is looking great. All the blood work they did came back fine but they did one more test today to check my thyroid since I had heart palpitations with the last pregnancy. I'm curious to see what will come back from that. Overall I am feeling much better and more motivated to get off the couch, which is a major improvement.

So the big ultrasound is my next visit April 7, so we'll see what happens. What do you guys think? Boy or Girl?

These are the tentative names we have so far. The boy name is majorly up for debate.

Genevieve Elise Gammon
Maximus Alan Gammon

I think I would be happy if the first name and middle name were switched with the boys name. I'll have to suggest that to Chad. Maximus just seems a little over the top for a first name. We would call him Max... but still.

I love baby names. One of my favorite blogs "How About Orange" featured this website today http://www.whatalovelyname.com I didn't find it extremely helpful but it was fun nonetheless.

Thoughts anyone?

Baby Walking

Well, I guess it's official Corben is walking!

He took his first steps about a week after turning one but it has been a process since then. He is a very careful child and likes to feel things out before he jumps into them. Case in point: His birthday cake. He touched the icing and tasted it ... then tasted a little more. I had to stick my finger in and show him the cake in hopes that that would get him going. But he was methodical... a little bit here and there until towards the end he was starting to get into it but he still didn't get really messy. He takes his time... he figures it out and eventually gets there.

So he has been "walking" for a while. Taking a step or two on his own and then walking along the couch then walking between two objects and now he is getting up and walking pretty regular. And he has figured out that he can carry things with him! He loves this! It's the best thing since sliced bread.

I guess I just expected him to do what everyone else said he would do. I would be asked if he was walking yet and I would say "Well he takes a few steps on his own" and they would reply "OH! just wait next week he'll be running around the house." Well that didn't happen. Walking was a few months in the making but that's just Corben. And I love that.

Valentine's with the other man in my life

Today was Valentine's Day. If you looked outside you wouldn't think so. It was so dreary and rainy. Chad had to work so we are going to celebrate tomorrow. So I was at home bored while Corben was taking a nap.... Okay there were things I could be doing but who wants to clean on valentines day? There was nothing on tv, not even a chick movie? wha? So I decided after Corben got up we were going on a date.

We went over to the Evans shopping center and walked around the stores for a little bit and let Corben "pick out" a card for daddy. Then we went to Panera for dinner. I have been craving the Broccoli and cheese soup, YUM! I had to stay away from it while breastfeeding cause the broccoli gave Corben gas. So I have to get it while I can before the next one gets here! I ordered the broccoli and cheese soup and got Corben a grilled cheese which comes with an organic blueberry yogurt (Corben's favorite). I tore his sandwich into little pieces on his plate and we both ate our dinner. I had such a good time. He was soo good and just ate his little sandwich and yogurt like a big boy. I think we'll have to do this every year. I made conversation.. even though he didn't have much to say but some grunting for more :) But I think he enjoyed our time just as much as I did.

Afterwards, I had to pick up a few things at kroger and right when we came in the door all you saw were balloons everywhere! Corben started pointing up and had this big smile on his face. I couldn't resist getting him one. I found the little ones on a stick that he could hold really easy. His face lit up and he held on and played with it the whole way through the store. I had to dodge a few balloon swipes near my face but I didn't mind, he was having so much fun.

I'm so glad I decided to celebrate Valentine's with him. It made my day. I am going to miss our time with "just us." I know the new baby will be wonderful and add a beautiful dynamic but I will miss our little trips with "just the two of us." I feel a Will Smith song coming on. Okay better stop the post now :)

Pokes, cupcakes, and will you be my friend?

Okay so am I the only one that thinks all this myspace/facebook stuff is kinda ridiculous? First it was myspace now facebook is more popular so you have to have a facebook page and a myspace page and keep up with all of it! Who has time for that?

I think I'm getting old. I find myself more and more thinking, why are these things so popular they are such a waste of time! Those young whipper snappers with nothing better to do :) Okay so I don't go that far but I don't think I'm far off.

I sit here complaining but yet I have a myspace and a facebook page. And I will keep them because how else will I stay in touch with all these people I barely see anymore? So I'm forced to keep up with the hype and the annoying task of updating my page. Which I rarely do. Facebook confuses the heck out of me. Why do you have to download an application to send someone a "gift". Why would I want to poke someone? Isn't that a little invasive. I don't go around poking people. What does all this mean?!

Maybe I'll feel better if someone sent me a cupcake... but why would I want a virtual cupcake... if you say your going to send me a cupcake there better be yummy icing and some cute thing on top that I can sink my teeth into. Don't taunt a pregnant woman! It's not pretty.

Preggo week 11

The nausea has subsided. I have enjoyed the taste of food for two days so I feel safe in saying that. I went two weeks straight feeling nauseated constantly. I had to force myself to eat anything. I thought I would be a skinny little thing by now but I've also laid around on the couch a lot so there was not a lot of calorie burning going on. I actually felt good enough to go outside and go for a walk with Corben today. So there is a light at the end of the belly.. so to speak.

I'm hoping this is the last of the nausea. I didn't want to be sick my whole pregnancy! So say a little prayer for my tummy... It's nice to be able to eat when your growing a little human!

It's official... we have a peanut!

We met with the midwife today. I didn't realize they were going to do everything in the first visit. Everything! Take blood... pap smear... and ultrasound! Boy am I glad Chad was off today or Corben would not have made it through all that!

I really liked the midwife. She's very sweet and we had plenty of time to talk. She took extra time to try and find the heart beat even though she said their was a chance she wouldn't be able to get it clearly this early... but there it was... loud and clear... A good strong heartbeat. So good the midwife thought I might be farther along than I thought. But the ultrasound had my due date right where we estimated... August 30. Big, Hot and sweaty! Not looking forward to a pregnant Georgia summer. So far so good! Our little peanut is doing well.

I'm not totally set in stone on going with the midwife yet. I still have time to feel it out but I feel good about it so far...
We'll see!

The death of a life's work

Okay I don't know where to start so here is the past two weeks in a nutshell

Work computer crashes... a few days later... my home computer's hard drive dies... I lose my life's work... I mourn losing my life's work... I get the flu... I sleep an entire day and barely move...well only enough to munch some toast...

Lord I need some grace and a good day! I'm hoping my friends tea party will give me some fun and recharging.

Maybe this is my chance to be free of my past work and start fresh with design. Be different, edgy, exciting in my creativity. I have to put a positive spin on this! It's just too sad to think about it any other way...

My first appointment finally!

I finally remembered to call the midwife today! I have an appointment for 2:15 PM on Monday. Yay!

I'm debating on taking Corben with me. They said that she doesn't mind if children come with you. I'll see how I feel about it. I just hope there aren't as many visits. I don't want to have 2 hour long ob visits with a one year old every month and then very week.

It's a whole new dynamic!
I hope I like the midwife... if I don't I'll probably go back to my old OB. We'll see.

Snow

It's a snow day! We actually have snow in SC/GA. I got Corben all bundled up and took him outside to catch some snowflakes.

Yipee!

Reminds me of when I was in 7th grade and my family moved to Pennsylvania for my Dad to pastor a church there. We got a couple inches of snow that year and my brother and I were freaking out! Of course everyone there thought we were crazy because they were used to seeing feet of snow. But a couple of inches was amazing to us. We built snowmen and had snowball fights. It was great. It's the little things people! You have to enjoy the little things...

Preggo Update

I haven't really said much about the upcoming new arrival so I thought I would do a little "preggo update." So far its been mostly nausea setting in. I feel tired but don't have time to be tired because I'm chasing a one year old around. It's a whole new definition of tired! I'm craving stuff but I don't know if it's just because I'm hungry more often or what? Graham crackers are definitely my friend!

Oh the diaper changes! I just know I'm going to hurl this pregnancy... not because it's nausea I can't control necessarily. It's the nausea and changing a disgusting diaper at the same time. NOT FUN AT ALL! Oh and on top of that...Daddy made changing time play time so now everytime Corben is on the changing table he kicks his legs wildly and laughs... so it makes it very hard to change a diaper!!! Thanks daddy! But I love you anyway!

Ugh I don't like disciplining. I know what my parents meant when I would get a spanking and they would say they are doing it because they love me. It would be so easy to just let my kid do whatever the heck he wants - like jump wildly off the changing table or pull out all the dvd's and crawl all over them ... sigh. Parenting is a lot of work and discipline!! More for you than for them! It's hard to be consistent every single time. You find yourself saying things too many times "Corben... no touch" as he takes his hand away... looks at me and then goes in to touch again.... I just want to say "no touch" again but I know I need get up off the couch and discipline or "train". It's just so easy to say ... don't make me tell you again... you heard what I said... don't do it again... one more time and I'm gonna.... It's just laziness, PARENT!! You are a parent... be one!! Sorry...little tangent there. Aren't there just times you wish you could just stop people in there tracks and give them a good shake... or kick in the rear? :) Love... can't you tell I'm in a loving mood?!

Okay I'm done with all my rabbit trails. Pregnancy is going great. I'm going to call the midwife first thing next week and make my first appointment.

Minty Fresh!

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Chad found this website through a friend and so far I am extremely impressed with it. Believe me, I am the free spirit in the relationship so spreadsheets and financial blah is not my favorite. But this website is totally free and will alert you when your bank account is low, you've went over your budget on a certain category etc. How cool is that? It even breaks down your monthly spending with pie charts (now I am a visual person!) I love it... and the best part - totally free! It tracks everything automatically. No need to calculate your receipts to figure out what you spent in each budget category... it does it for you and you can see automatically where your money is going and if you spent too much on shopping this month! Oops!

www.mint.com

Check it out. You won't be disappointed. Not to mention their logo is pretty snazzy too. :)

Great Are You

When I was checking my friend Sara's blog this week she had one of her favorite songs called "who am I" as a feature on her "favorite Friday" at first I mistook it for a song by a not extremely well known band called Downhere. After looking back at their cd on my itunes library I realized that the song is called "Great Are You," "who am I" is a phrase in the chorus.

I started listening to a few of their songs that I haven't heard in so long. They are really amazing. My two favorites are "Calmer of the Storm" and "Great Are You." Of course the song "Rock Stars Need Money" is hilarious but not as spiritually fulfilling :) "Calmer of the Storm" really speaks to me. It talks about the storms of life and how we want so much to control our will and God's. Man are they reading my mail. I'm a "fixer" if something goes wrong I can take care of it, handle it, flip it around backwards and hang it by it's toes until it works. I, I, I... Do we see a pattern here? I'm so glad that I came to know the Lord at a young age because... sometimes I really think if I was left to my own devices I would be an agnostic or just think that I am capable enough to handle the world. I need God, I can't do this thing called life on my own. I can't have a good marriage, be a loving mother, a calm discipliner, an understanding wife. I would not know the peace that comes through a relationship with him. And I would not be as willing and able to give grace even when, in my own flesh, I feel the person doesn't deserve it. Of course they don't... do any of us? Does that change the fact that you should freely give? Nope.

Here is their song "Great Are You." I couldn't find a great video of it because they aren't a huge band but this should suffice. I love live music... but that's another post...

How I love your works, My God, My King...

Good God, Good Doctor, Good All Around.

I had my first interview with a pediatrician. I never got around to doing interviews before Corben because ... let's see.. I was working full time, OBGYN visits, lamaze classes etc. So it just didn't happen. I'm kind of glad I did it now after I've been a mom for a year, I feel like I know more of what to ask, what my practical concerns are...

Of course the doctor started off with the normal spiel about how the office is run. What appointments will be like, how long, and that I can call him anytime etc. Then asked if I had any questions. I was very upfront about my main concern which was in general his medical philosophy on the big issues like breastfeeding, vaccines, when to start solid foods, and am I going to be asked to come in every time I have a question about something or does he promote trying to take care of issues at home.

I was very impressed with his answers and he seemed very down to earth and sensible. That's all I wanted! He admitted that vaccine concerns are valid and any type of intervention has possible side effects. He had a child die from Amoxicillin. It's very rare but it happens. Thank you! Finally someone that admits that there should be caution with anything we give our children. I'm not crazy! Okay maybe a little :) He said that usually the way he handles it when parents don't want any, is that he suggests some that he thinks are very necessary and then there are some that aren't as necessary. In hopes that they would at least try the more pressing ones. He said he's perfectly fine with a modified schedule and for the past seven years he decided to not give the MMR until after two because of all the concerns from parents about autism. He doesn't personally believe that there is a correlation but that's what he decided to do in his practice. He actually cares about what the parents are concerned about? Enough to change how he gives vaccines... against the suggested schedule??? I totally expected to be disappointed to tell you the truth. I searched for pediatricians in the area and many of them had strong opinions about it on their websites. So I knew I should not even try with those practices.

We discussed his experience and training with breastfeeding moms and babies and when to start solids etc. And I was upfront with my view on going to see doctors - of course I want your opinion but there are going to be those times when I feel like I should go with my motherly instincts. He said "a lot of mom's come in with lots of questions and I'll go through each one with them and make suggestions and give my medical opinion and if you want to try another way then I just note that on the chart and it's no big deal."

The biggest issue was for me to feel like I can have an open conversation with my son's doctor. If I can't then I know my son isn't going to get the best medical care. And I do feel like I can talk to this doctor. He was reasonable and approachable.

That's all I wanted and I got it with the first doctor I interviewed. God is so good. Now I don't have to worry about where Corben will get medical care and if I will have to fight my doctor every visit or feel like a crazy person just because I want to do something different.

Peace. God takes care of us every step of the way.

So we'll probably have our 18 month check up with the new doctor and then shortly after we'll have well baby checkups with the new addition.

I could not be happier and the best part is he is right around the corner. I could walk to the practice if I wanted to. How nice is that? If there is ever a major concern and I need to bring Corben in I won't have to go far.

.. Did I mention that God is good?